Image from www.ajtherapieshealthcentre.co.uk
For the past two nights I’ve been practicing reiki on myself before I go to sleep. To do this, I’m placing my hands on the parts of my body that correspond to the energy centres and visualizing the colour associated with each area. Although I’m attuned to reiki 1 and 2 and have had very intense experienced with it, it’s been a long time since I’ve used it.
I woke up yesterday feeling very ill, much worse than normal. I had severe flu like cramps in my muscles, leg making it hard to walk about. This is not unusual for my condition but the pain was more intense than I’d felt for some time. There was no reason to feel worse; I had not overdone physical activity or been especially stressed, so I guessed the effect was due to reiki and I waited patiently for the energy to do what it had to do, trusting it was for my highest good.
Last night I repeated the process, visualizing the corresponding colour as I rested my hands on the energy centres for around 3-5 minutes each. I was very tired and quickly fell asleep after completing all the hand positions. Overnight I had some very strange dreams about being back in childhood, yet in a wheelchair (I occasionally need to use a wheelchair for trips out, but certainly did not as a child). The dreams involved me being rejected by my family and peers; in one, my sister refused to take me out due to me being in a wheelchair. In another, nobody at school would be my partner during P.E. What was also significant in both these dreams was the grief I experienced during them. I was suppressing the urge to cry and in so doing the pain at the back of my throat was so intense it was burning. I’m sure most of us have experienced that sensation when there is a tremendous urge to cry yet also to swallow it back down.
I woke up with that sensation and the grief still vivid in my mind although once I had fully awoken the urge to cry disappeared. Immediately, I remembered having my hands on my throat chakra and the brilliant blue I had imagined flowing into that entire area. I guessed the dreams had released a blockage that still existed. Whilst I could not remember a time my sister had wanted to take me our as per the dream, I had indeed been rejected by her and also by my peers at school. The memories of having no one to be my partner in P.E are especially clear to me and have been the source of much pain over the years. When one is insecure at that age, peer rejection is no less than traumatizing.
Using reiki has reminded me that despite all the talking I have done over the years, as well as some crying, there must be blockages that remain on an energy level. I feel hopeful that continuing to use reiki on a regular basis will help shift any remaining emotional pain and even lead to better physical health. I hope so.